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Va. Tech Fan Breaks into Condo, Passes Out in Lobby

by ARLnow.com February 12, 2013 at 2:35 pm 8,691 119 Comments

(Updated at 2:45 p.m.) A man in a Virginia Tech sweatshirt broke into the lobby of a Virginia Square condominium and passed out on the lobby couch, according to Arlington County Police.

The alleged incident happened early Monday morning, on the 3600 block of 10th Street N. The visibly intoxicated man reportedly damaged the door to the building and “ruined” the couch — although a police spokesman was unable to specify the nature of the damage.

According to Arlington’s daily crime report, the man left before police arrived.

Between 2 am and 7:40 am on February 10, an unknown subject forced entry into the lobby of a condominium. The subject then walked through the lobby and passed out on the lobby couch. The lobby door and couch both sustained damage. The subject is described as a white male in his 20’s, approximately 6’0” tall and 180 lbs. He has brown hair and a light complexion. At the time of the incident, the suspect was wearing a blue and red Nationals hat and an orange VT sweatshirt.

  • DCCav

    Figures. Hokies can’t hold their beverages.

    • BBMS

      Couch sustained damage. Lightweight.

    • Anon Y. Mous
      • Math Skillz

        Silly Hokie read the article, not just the headline (could be the moral of the whole story eh?), margin of error for the study is 5%; $700 out of $52,900 is less than 2%; Well within reason its a statistical fluke.

        And oh, 38-0 was 2 years ago, ya die hard fan

        • Anon Y. Mous

          You know what isn’t a statistical fluke? 2,998 days of holding the Commonwealth Cup and counting.

          • Ahhlington

            It’s all about the cup, BRAH.

          • If He Had A Cup

            Common courtesy …..should have used the cup rather than the couch…..just sayin’……

        • Greg

          This is the best Wahoo smack talk ever! Were you sipping a nice wine cooler with Buffy when you wrote this?

          • Art

            Did you watch the Hoos humiliate your basketball team at home?

            Guess what — tonight they’re going to do it again in Charlottesville.

            Enjoy the game and try not to pass out drunk on someone’s couch, little Hokie.

          • JamesE

            lol, no one is going to watch that terrible game. I’d rather watch the Caps as bad as they are.

          • HOO

            Two words: poultry science.

      • Ryan

        Holla at me when your school is ranked in the Top 5 of anything, please.

        Best public college Forbes
        Best part school Playboy
        Best college city (Charlottesville, VA) Travel Channel

        Without a football team, VT is known for, well, nothing. With a football team? They’re known for choking.

      • Sean

        That study (both starting salary and median salary) only looks at people who don’t go to graduate school. By virtue of the amount of engineers at Tech, they may have a little edge out of the gate. It also doesn’t take into account 4 year graduation rates.

        But not counting law school, med school, business school, etc doesn’t really tell you much. For example, of my pledge class at UVa (11 people), 2 are doctors, 4 are lawyers (fwiw Stanford, Harvard, Richmond, and UVA), and all but one of the others have post graduate degrees. (class of ’99). I’d put them up against any class from VT any day, and my frat wasn’t exactly known for being studious.

        None of those people who be considered for median salary study as they don’t fit into the category this study looked at. Va Tech has very good Engr and Arch programs, but other than that it is just your average land grant university with mediocre (at best) programs. UVa is a world class institution, one of the first public ivies, and always comes in at the top of the rankings for public universities. But you do have a better football team, so there is that.

        • except

          So you are saying UVA is great if you go get a 2nd degree. So how does that make UVA so good exactly? Plus, the undergrad business school at UVA sucks. I will say Darden is great for MBA, but undergrad those kids are essentially libby art queers.

      • HOO

        At UVA, we learned about margins of error too.

      • b0rk


        Whoopsies! Looks like the Cavs spanked the Hokies… again. Final score 73-55 last night.

      • Matty T

        That survey is true. Two things to keep in mind. VT grads do not end life making more that UVa grads. UVa grads are much more likely to attend grad school, medical school, etc, rather than going into Engineering, a field currently experiecing a boost in salaries.

  • Cletus Van Damme

    Really guys? That’s the headline you go with? He couldn’t be a Nationals fan? This website is a joke.

    • drax

      Shirt beats hat.

      • marie antoinette

        LoL. Well played Drax…

    • BBMS

      Agree, it should have said “alumni”. Face it, nobody roots for them except those that went there as their 3rd option.

      • JamesE

        herp derp

      • TryTheTacos

        That is just outright wrong. I went there… as my 2nd option.

    • Aol

      This website been’s a joke for a longtime

      • Mike

        Nice spelling and grammar, Hokie.

        • b0rk

          Hey, hey, give ’em a break. Aol was busy studying cow turds in the hills, not book learnin’ like some sissy city boy.

  • Sheriff Gonna Getcha

    that headline is awful, seriously? GTFO.

    • CrystalMikey

      The headline is true is it not? Dude was wearing a VT shirt, therefore most likely a fan.

      • Sheriff Gonna Getcha

        wearing a VT shirt likely makes you a VT Fan? So no other circumstances could have led to this man wearing a VT Shirt?

        Thats definitely it. I know that since I have a Brewers hat I must be a die-hard brewers fan.

        • joey zaza

          I can’t think of why any non-fan would choose to wear those butt-ugly colors. Maroon and orange? Not exactly a good fashion statement.

          • HOO


        • CrystalMikey

          Reading is fundamental. I said “most likely”.

  • Mike Honcho

    Probably lost his Phillies hat, and borrowed his buddies 2012 NL East Division Champ Nationals hat.

    • NoVA RN

      That was almost funny. Nice try.

  • elizabeth

    wooooah, what about his nats hat? horrible reporting

  • TurtleCake

    I like how the first thing someone says is that Hokies can’t hold their beverages, trying to start a war of words like a big Internet tough guy…

    • Mike

      “YOU WANNA BEEF BRAH? Here, hold my Bud Light.”

      • JamesE

        Don’t pop your collar, bro.

        • DCCav

          “TurtleCake?” How did a UMd Terp get let into this?

          • BIG_TEN


  • RonMexico

    I always wondered what my boy Marcus was up to.

    • Mike Honcho

      That stains gonna glow in the dark. Might want to stop by Goodwill after work, and pick up a new sofa.

    • Jane Doe

      15 year olds?

  • stephen strasburg

    “Nationals fan breaks into condo, passes out in lobby”. Really guys? Thats’s the headline you go with? He couldn’t be a Tech fan? This website is a joke. There, I fixed the title, and added a stupid comment so yours wouldn’t be alone. This website is a joke, yet you continue to come back to read and post?

    • Cletus Van Damme

      Stephen, shouldn’t you be stretching and practicing long throwing? You sure do take great offense to a comment on a website. You wouldn’t have any affiliation with this website, would you? Be careful…

    • Bryce Harper

      That’s a clown comment, bro.

  • BallstonianuntilI went to Tech

    That Hokie wandered a long way from Blacksburg. I wonder how the couch “sustained damage” along with the door? Did he barf on the couch?

    • b0rk

      Likely peed his pants, if he’s like other Hokies I know…

  • Pat M

    Sounds like someone had too much Zima. My guess is someone will be drinking Shirley Temples during lent…

    • JamesE

      Zima? It was a VT sweatshirt not UVA.

      • Cletus Van Damme


  • Hoo Dat

    Wahoowa… nuff said

    • London School of Clock Mgmt

      3000 days. I’d be upset too.

      • UVAguy69

        “Look dad i dun pissed my overalls”

  • drax

    Time for a white-male-Tech-fan roundup!

    • CrystalMikey

      That would put the Ballroom and Mister Days out of business.

      • JamesE

        more like 75% of all bars in Arlington

        • WeiQiang

          … but not Freddie’s

    • Louise


    • Hee-Haw

      when is it time for a repeat comment offender roundup ?

  • elizabeth

    this is newsworthy? are you kidding me, arlnow? i appreciate fluff pieces and random atown tidbits but this suchhh a stretch. by far the worst piece i’ve ever seen on here.

    • R. Griffon

      Oh the humanity. Won’t someone please think of the children?!

    • Arlington Cat

      Yes it is newsworthy. How many times does some drunk 20 something bro in Arlington pass out on a lobby sofa and toss his cookies after drinking till the early Sunday morning hours? Oh, now I see your point.

      • TinkleToes

        How do you know he didn’t piss himself?

  • novasteve

    Man, if I get a terminal cancer diagnosis, I’m so going to do that with an Ohio State sweatshirt on.

    • everyone

      may you wish come true

  • oslo

    could very well be a wahoo in disguise.

  • dr seuss

    hahaha poor Hokies sound so butthurt about this. Calm down guys

    • JamesE

      I’m not upset I think it is hilarious but I do like all the UVA fans coming out of the closet.

  • Pat M

    Where is ACPD on this? I do not expect this type of crime to occur in North Arlington! Perhaps the authorities can perform a round up at Hard Times and Mr. Days to remove this scourge from our beloved Orange Line community. Perhaps South Arlington is best suited for these scofflaws…

    And if you read Arlnow.com as your “fair and balanced” news source, you are a rube…

  • Autoexec.bat

    I need to see a Brofile™ before rendering judgement.

    • JamesE

      he got away! No brofile

      • drax

        The cops need to do a composite Brofile™ sketch.

        • WeiQiang

          … which is why they’re calling in a sketch brahtist.

          • b0rk

            Subject was a white male in his college 20’s. Likely a douche.

            Quick, round up the Ballston-Courthouse strip!

  • I-66

    I thought it might be Trevor, but it turns out he is in jail since 2/1/2013.

    • balston’sboy

      Do you know what the visiting hours are?

    • JamesE

      Maybe he broke out

  • UVAguy69

    I’m suprised he wasnt wearing some sort of camo, then he could truely be called a Hokie

    • Courthouse Res

      Truly. It’s sad that they don’t teach basic spelling at UVA. TJ is probably weeping.

      • Arlington Cat

        It doesn’t “surprise” me a bit.

        • Scott

          Tech. Home of the dog killer

    • Greg

      You haven’t seen your Football coach lately, huh? “UVA Football is like war, bro!”

  • Ahhlington

    Pretty sure that three quarters (that’s 75%, Hokies) of Clarendon’s weekend d-baggery is made up of former Virginia Tech bros and trixies who just can’t let their glory days go. Safety school ftw!!!

  • Arl-Later

    MAybe it should have read “Green eyed man” or “Brown haired” or “pants wearing”

    Seriously- lame headline Arlnow.

  • novasteve

    Can’t be charged with burglary because voluntary intoxication is a defense to specific intent crimes.

    • Judge


    • NovaJim

      Any attorney with at least one day’s experience practicing in criminal law would know this comment is malarky.

      • novasteve

        How am I wrong? Is not voluntary intoxiation a defense to specific intent crimes? Is burglary not a specific intent crime? Notice, to the ignorant commenters here, I didn’t say he can’t be charged with anything, I just said burglary. So take your ignorance of the law elsewhere.

  • Arlington Cat

    The subject is described as a white male in his 20’s, approximately 6’0” tall and 180 lbs. He has brown hair and a light complexion.

    I say we put Balston’sboy on the case of figuring out who this bro is.

    • JamesE

      “The couch was covered in garlic” Says police spokesman

      • Arlington Cat


  • Gangam Style

    Anyone consider that a Wahoo came by and pissed on him……

    • WeiQiang


      statistically most likely.

  • joey zaza

    The article doesn’t mention the jorts and goatee. If he’s actually a Hokie and not an imposter, those are mandatory.

  • Somewhere else

    This is exactly why I left Northern Virginia. Too many over-entitled, pretentious UVa douches and hick-ass VT rednecks who can’t get out of what “par at best” college they went to. Hey, turns out no one in the real world gives a F**K about UVa or Virginia Tech. Get out of Virginia and experience not having your “pledge bro’s” (UVa) or “muddin’ buddies” (VT) to fall back on.

    • Rory

      If you left Northern Virginia, why do you read this blog?

      • drax


  • ThingsWhitePeopleLike

    1. ARLnow
    2. Arguing over whose college is better

    • Rory

      Not much of an argument in this case. Crystal clear

  • Hey Brah!

    What about his personal damages? If he’s that hammered, he probably booted on himself or, even better, pooped himself. Now THAT is the reporting I want to know about.

  • Vick4Pres

    Sorry, I pissed on the couch!

  • Shirlguy

    At least we Hokies know our University’s mission. Land grant. Serving the Commonwealth. Making lives better here and around the world. Meanwhile in Hooville, you have a President and a Board of Visitors and a student body lost, meandering around, pinning its hopes on rankings left and right. Go ahead, compare each schools’ websites – VT’s mission is easy to find. Hooville State? Rankings are front and center! And certainly NOT the University OF Virginia.

    • b0rk

      Wow, someone get Shirlguy a box of tissues and a tube of Preparation-H. They have a LOT of butt hurt going on!

  • Marie Antoinette

    I don’t have a dog in this fight; but I will say that Hokies are the most annoying twits in the Commonwealth. But for a college football team that routinely gets embarrassed on national TV, you have nothing to offer. And btw, the minute you start talking about your football team, you’ve already lost the argument. Because everyone in the Commonwealth already knows VA Tech is nothing but a one trick pony.

    • JamesE

      Wrong, just like your election predictions.

    • Jackfan

      They’re all jealous they didn’t get into UVa. Had to go to their 4th place cow college – that is if they didn’t get off PSU’s wait list…

    • HoosNArlington

      What are you talking about? “Rankings are front and center” on the website? Besides it being a lame argument, it’s just not even remotely true..

      Sounds like someone has an inferiority complex. Get over it. Study hard and attend The University for grad school… perhaps that will alleviate some of your frustration.

  • Marie Antoinette


    Touche~ (+1)

  • nom de guerre

    My sources have reported that the suspect also received a certificate from the David Hasselhoff School of Drinking which is a part of the Clown Enema University which is located in The Land of Chocolate.

  • The Ballston Baller

    UVA means grape in Espanol.

  • Virginia Squared

    I like Virginia Tech.

  • yairmarx

    I knew the comments for this article were going to be good, I was not disappointed. The best part is, this is the first time I heard the term Brofile, I just looked it up…..HILARIOUS!


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