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Couch Causes Accident on I-395

by ARLnow.com February 14, 2013 at 12:10 pm 1,412 53 Comments

Arlington Police CarA rogue couch caused a single-vehicle accident on I-395 last night, according to police radio traffic.

The couch fell off a truck on southbound I-395 near the Pentagon. It’s unclear if the victim of the accident ran into the couch or swerved and ran into a highway barrier.

No injuries were reported. Police attempted to locate the owner of the couch, but as of this morning no police report has been filed, according to an ACPD spokesman.

File photo

  • Hee-Haw

    It’s probably the same couch the VT Bro passed out on. They had to get rid of it cause he left a “Poppy” stain on it.

  • SomeGuy

    Another couch incident in the police report this week?! I think we know what time it is, drax…

    • drax

      Time for a drunken Va. Tech fan passed out on a couch after breaking into a condo roundup? Our jails aren’t big enough.

      • FrenchyB

        Bunch of savages in this town.

    • nom de guerre

      Does anyone know what the disinfecting schedule is for couches that are located in the lobby areas of local condos?

  • nom de guerre

    My sources report that the “rogue” couch was the victim of the “VT Fan” who soiled it while taking a brief nap after breaking into the VA Square condo the other morning.

    • SnArl

      Wow that was funny. Spit water out all over my keyboard.

    • TJBangedSlaves

      If only 3 people above you didn’t make the same joke it could have been funny!

      When did UVA chumps get so BUTTHURT

      • HoosUp

        Typical VT alum vocabulary…. butthurt. Just because the junkies use it doesn’t mean it looks cool for you to do. Good luck with getting into another school for your graduate degree.

  • Sad

    Okay I realize this is Arlignton but this is really scraping the bottom of the barrel. This is not news.

    • j

      Neither is Roo: Pet of the Week. It’s a blog. Chillax bro.

      • Sad

        Pet of the Week is a weekly feature. ARLnow classifies themselves as a pioneering online news organization. Chillax bro? Christ.

        • drax

          The number of hits count the same whether you come here to read it or to bash it, bro.

          • Sad

            I’m not concerned about the number of hits. I’m concerned about your inability to understand a 20 word message. Seek help, bro.

          • drax

            I understood it just fine, bro. I’m saying it doesn’t matter one bit. Bro.

          • HoosNArlington


          • Hee-Haw

            Can we get a “Bro of the week” feature now ?

          • meh..

            CHILL Bros!

          • WeiQiang

            damn sorry i missed the brah’s bro’ing down.

            ArlNow’s version of ‘Step Up’

          • Time to break this out again: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duMdVGXuwX4

    • CrystalMikey

      This not being news is strictly your opinion.

      • Sad

        You must be the guy who got in the accident! Nice one!

        • CrystalMikey

          Negative….but nice try.

          • Sad

            No, seriously. How is this news unless you were the one that got in the accident?

          • so is no accident news unless you were involved? how about robbery? come on.

    • dr seuss

      Yea, well, ya know, that’s just like, your opinion, man.

    • SouthArlJD

      It’s ARLINGTON. Sometimes bottom of the barrel newswise is all we’ve got.

  • ACDC Hack

    Hazmat teams have been scrambled from their location on Donaldson Run and are proceeding at “Code Brown” to the scene…..film at 6:00.

  • drax

    One less set piece for the sex conference.

  • John Fontain

    I think they should couch the investigation until they’ve had a chance to review the footage from the traffic cameras.

    • drax

      They can do that as soon as the authorities furnish the tapes.

      • John Fontain

        Nice one. A very nuanced approach.

        • WeiQiang

          it’s all “he chaise, she chaise” anyhow.

          • drax

            Beat you to it (see below).

    • Flaming Bob

      Oh man, that pun was sofa king awful!

      • MyHood

        Now THAT’s a pun!! Good one.

      • CrystalMikey


      • drax

        Chaise you.

      • Josh S

        There was a pun there?

      • Recognizing a pun, with another off-color pun? So divan!

      • Recognizing a pun with another, off-color, pun? So divan!

  • BlueSkies

    Sofa so good for driver who survived couch crash on 395.

  • Yup I Went There

    You know they wouldn’t have crashed if they were on a streetcar.

  • Homer Simpson

    Doh, no couch gag today.

  • Professional Bum

    Really no comment about whether the couch was an automatic?

  • Drunk_IrishChick

    Bet the couch was on the way to college park so they could burn it after Duke Beats them Saturday.

  • KRM

    A Craigslist sale gone bad?

  • YTK

    Hope the accident victim is OK.
    Be sure you check for money under those couch cushions.

  • Stuck in traffic last night on 395

    I for one am very thankful for this post and I guess you can only appreciate this post if you had to sit in the 45 minutes worth of backed up traffic on 395 last night. I had assumed that it was because of the rain. Thank you for the update!!!

  • Thanks

    Thank you drax, j, whatever your name is

  • Clarendon Cruiser

    I think it was a fold out couch on the way to the CatalystCon East convention, pre or post stains, I don’t know?

  • jim jones

    now..ive had an accident ON my couch.

  • Not Me

    It’s still there this morning…


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