Police: Chicken Stolen from Crock Pot

by ARLnow.com February 22, 2013 at 10:00 am 1,448 80 Comments

Crock PotArlington County Police responded to a bizarre reported burglary on Tuesday afternoon.

A resident on the 600 block of S. Carlin Springs Road told officers that someone stole a chicken from her crock pot as it was cooking. It happened sometime between 9:00 a.m. and 1:30 p.m., while the resident was away from the apartment.

“She returned to find the chicken had been taken, and there were only vegetables remaining in the crock pot,” said Arlington County Police spokesman Dustin Sternbeck.

How the chicken was taken remains a bit of a mystery. There was no sign of forced entry and Sternbeck noted that there was no pet in the apartment that might have stolen the chicken for a meal.

“We suspect fowl play,” Sternbeck quipped.

Photo via Crock-Pot.com

  • hahahahahahahaha

    Any mention of the resident’s age?

    • nom de guerre

      There is only one residential address/building in the 600 block of South Carlin Springs Road-it is the Woodland Hills Senior Adult Apartments.

      • drax


        • Mack

          I see what you did there.

      • snarl

        watchit –you will both be old someday…..

        • drax

          So? Did I do something bad to the elderly or something?

          • sunflower

            the implication i get is that an elderly person with loss of faculties was involved in this episode. am i reading too much into this? possibly. maybe im over-reacting to someones use of “hag” in the postings on the pizza hut incident. heck, im sensitive enough to see “bingo” as a pejorative.

          • drax

            Yeah, so?

            When I’m old, people can imply the same about me, and they’ll probably be right.

            I didn’t say “hag.” Don’t blame me for that.

            As for “bingo” as a subtle perjorative for old people – damn, I wish I’d thought of that.

  • probably


    • Hee-Haw

      good call, the resident probably forgot to put the chicken in the crock pot. Did the police even check the refrigerator?

  • novasteve

    It’s that Raccoon again.

  • Rev. Jeremiah Wright

    “Arlington’s chickens are comin’ home….TO ROOST!”

  • snarl

    now we dont even have a chicken in evey pot…..soon we will lose the pot….

  • Naked Man

    Smells like crotch-rotch cookin’

  • drax

    Somebody really really really opposes having chickens in Arlington.

    • It’s chicken discrimination, I tell you: in 2012, they were banned from backyards; in 2013, they are banned from kitchens!

      • SomeGuy

        Definitely discrimination, but the culprit is probably the bigoted pot, i.e. the same pot that’s known for calling the kettle black.

  • Bumpus

    Anybody seen my hounds?

    • Ralphie

      In the heat of battle my father wove a tapestry of obscenities that as far as we know is still hanging in space over Lake Michigan.

      • Douglas Parker

        Love that line.

    • Ursa’s Mom


  • ballstonianfrombirth

    Fry ’em…..

  • Cakes

    I don’t know that I’d leave food cooking unattended. I hesitate to leave my dryer running when I leave the house…

    • ArlingtonNative

      Come on! That’s what crock pots are for.

      • Hee-Haw

        nope, bad idea.

    • CW

      Probably a good idea; someone might steal your clothes.

  • Jack

    What a groaner of a pun!

  • Darren McGavin

    god damn bumpuses

    • Ralphie

      Aha, the Bumpus hounds! Da-da-da-da-da-daah! Our hillbilly neighbors, the Bumpuses had over 785 smelly hound dogs, and they ignored every other human being on earth except my old man!

  • glofun

    Man, that’s foul…

  • Hikin’ the pike

    No stock photos! I want a picture of the actual crock pot! I want to feel as if I was there.

  • Dave

    If that chicken had a gun to protect itself, it would still be deliciously marinating in the crock pot.

    • I know right

      You weren’t there, man.

  • whaley

    Why would the cops even respond to a call like this. Glad my taxmoney goes toward stolen crock pot chikens instead of crack pot crooks

    • Call me Ishmael

      If you knew that a person had entered your home at particular time while your were away WITHOUT taking anything, I’ll bet you would call the police (the non-emergency line, or course). Why should it be any different if that person stole something of little value?

      • drax

        Well, yeah, because obviously someone snuck in, stole hot, half-cooked chicken out of a pot, and left without taking anything else or leaving a trace. Couldn’t be any other explanation.

    • Juanita de Talmas

      The crock pot squad is due to be laid off, according to yesterday’s ARLNow.

  • ARLRi

    Call me weird but that picture makes me a tad bit hungry…

  • Quackers


    • JamesE

      ChupacaBRO, native to Arlington

  • The Big Bird

    Thank you chicken for attending my protest rally. You can now go back to your crock pot.

  • YTK

    It HAD to have been the neighborhood CrackPot.

  • Mike Honcho

    The chicken has flown the coop!

  • I can see next week’s headline: Pie Left on Windowsill Mysteriously Vanishes

  • novasteve

    Next time one of my socks goes missing in the laundry I shall be calling the police!

  • Chicken

    You’ll never find me!

    • Sheri


  • Wayne Kubicki

    Bulletin: “Arlington public safety budget cuts shown to have adverse culinary impacts. Poor and minorities affected most.”

  • 350sbc

    Seriously? I can’t take this site seriously anymore.

    • drax

      Be sure to keep coming back to this site to post about how you can’t take it seriously any more.

      • Clown

        Be sure to keep addressing negative comments. Load that personal pan pizza up with toppings tonight; you’ve earned it!

        • Round and Round

          Be sure keep addressing those who keep addressing negative comments. Enjoy your Papa Johns; you’ve earned it.

          • Ahnold

            Awww. Poor baby. How sweaty were your palms when you were cutting and pasting that response?

          • Round and Round

            Pretty sweaty. Even sweatier after hearing your tough guy talk. Yowza.

          • Ahnold

            Well I am The Terminator. So yeah, I’m pretty tough. Tip well.

  • Arlington notable

    These comments are off-putting!

  • drax

    Time for a fox roundup!

    • snarl

      im sure youd love to round up a few foxes……

      • drax

        Whenever I try, I always end up with ClarendonSkank.

        • snarl

          chacun a son gout…..

  • Hamburgler

    I’m sorry, but I gave up red meat for Lent

    • Stephanie Todd


  • Civic Activbist

    This discussion is like a meeting of our County Board: all crock and no meat.

  • Marie Antoinette

    Did the chicken have large talons?

  • Is it just me

    Why did the chicken cross the road?

    • Rodney Dangerfield

      To pay its higher real estate tax bill for 2013.

    • ConstantCritic

      To get out of the crock pot?

  • lastcall
  • WFY

    I wish the Nats had gone with Hoover instead of Taft for the 5th racing president — he could have been outraged by this crime.

  • Erika


    • Bawk!


  • Seeing it like it is

    I remember about 25 years ago, when I was on ACPD we had an elderly lady call 911 with an unknown emergency on Thanksgiving. We responded and found out that the reason for the 911 call was that the turkey had finished cooking and nobody else was around to help her lift the bird out of the oven for her. (Face palm).

    • My roommate is a dispatcher at a University police station. My favorite story is when a student called 911 because she dropped her beta fish down her garbage disposal.

  • Chicken

    I’m sorry, it’s not you, it’s me. We’ve grown apart and now I’ve moved on. I’ve found another crockpot who loves me for who I am. For you, I was just another meal. But for him, I’m really something. I am more than a dish, I am le plat principal. I’ve moved on. I hope you can, too.

  • muffie1

    Did anyone ask the members of the apartment building’s staff, who presumably have keys to the apartments, what they had for lunch? (Not that they would feel obliged to tell the truth.) Some years ago, beer was stolen from my condo refrigerator by an employee who had no authorization to enter my place. One of the culprits was dismissed after over-consumption of stolen goods, and then barricading himself in his van with a shotgun one night.

  • NochickensinArl

    Haha the chicken went to Ed Fendley’s house to lay eggs

  • VaSqJay

    My thoughts and prayers go out to the victim of this crime.

  • Doobie Brothers

    The thief has now angered Herbert Hoover.

  • Marla

    A lot of tempest in a pot of crock.

  • eljay

    what a crock!


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